Parasocial Relationships

If you’ve spent time online in the past few years, you’ve probably heard the term “parasocial relationship.” You may have even had a few and not known it. A parasocial relationship is a one-sided relationship between a person who devotes their time to a person (or people, or groups of people) who doesn’t even know they exist. Often it takes the form of adoring fans following a celebrity’s career and personal life. In recent years, many people have latched onto internet celebrities, such as YouTube stars or Twitch streamers, but famous musicians, movie stars, and athletes are still a go-to when discussing parasocial relationships. Think about how much you’ve learned about various movie stars throughout the years from reading tabloids, watching gossip TV shows, or just casually browsing Twitter. There’s nothing wrong with taking interest in a person or their work.

               The problem is when it becomes obsessive. A classic example is “teenage girls being in love with boybands.” You don’t have to have ever listened to One Direction to have heard stories of their fans violating their privacy or harassing their significant others. (Note: while “fangirls” may be a well-known example, this behavior is nowhere near exclusive to girls or teenagers. Anyone, of any age or gender, can have a parasocial relationship and get obsessive. Nor is it a behavior that any age or gender automatically has.) When people follow a celebrity’s career so closely for so long, they start to believe they actually know the person. They may assume that through knowing so many things about the person, they have a genuine connection, despite the object of their affection not knowing they even exist. Further, how someone portrays themselves to the media is not actually indicative of who they are as a person. It’s a persona. People naturally modify their behavior to the situations they are in. Just because you’ve listened to someone’s album a hundred times and watched every interview of them on YouTube doesn’t mean you know who they are in person.

               As previously stated, an interest in someone’s career can turn obsessive. This includes stalking, harassing, and even threatening the person at the other end, or the people close to them. It can turn dangerous. People with parasocial relationships may also harass or threaten people for not liking the same person or see them as a “threat” if they appear to be in competition with the other side of the relationship. Think about how intense sports rivalries can get. It’s not unheard of nowadays for celebrities to have their fans dogpile (mass online harassment of a specified target) people saying negative things about them. Things can get particularly hairy with famous online content creators, who many view as more accessible than traditional celebrities due to the online nature. Sometimes, content creators or celebrities will intentionally portray themselves as open and accessible to foster parasocial relationships with their fans. They encourage their fans to view their relationship as a two-way street to maintain a sense of fan loyalty.

               Of course, this isn’t every relationship a person has to a celebrity they like. Often times people are just interested, to varying degrees, in someone’s entertainment career but never gets obsessive over it. It can be innocuous, like knowing which celebrities you share a birthday with (I share mine with the late Stan Lee) or going out of your way to see a movie because you like the lead. There’s nothing wrong with that. Just remember that you do not know the person on the other end.